AFL Grand Final

Well I have recently got a promotion and now I have become a Senior Traffic Engineer. What this means is that I get paid a little more but have more responsibility and will be held accountable. I guess after 9 years in the engineering field this was bound to happen. What to do??

Guess this is a feather in the cap but now I should spend less time blogging, reading sports articles on the net and emailing friends and more time working!

Anyway, it is AFL grand final week. This year’s GF involves the 2 teams from last year – West Coast Eagles and Sydney Swans. Sadly the swannies won last year by a few points so I am hoping the result is reversed this year.

I will not get to involved in explaining Aussie Rules footy suffice to say it involves a mergement of rugby, football, grid iron with an oval shaped ball. I do not really get into the sport but coz my home town team is in I better represent.

Still I like the AFL GF as it is a big day with lots of hype and atmosphere. In a way it is a smaller scale of the Superbowl. Mainly coz we are not as big and demented as the US of bush.

My pick is for the Eagles to win, just barely and the match will be exciting! I hope I have enough energy to see the Pool match that night.

So that is that:

Talking about football – the ‘Pool did their best to drop points against Galatasaray but managed to hold on. Apparently Peter Crouch scored a super scissor kick which would be a sight to see. Good to see and I reckon my mate Rafa should consider playing him and Kuyt together.

Tomorrow if Friday…weekend nearly here..whew!

Sir Alex did not do his reading about READING

Ahh what a nice weekend sportswise.

Firstly, the 'Pool get a 3 nil win over the Spurned from Tottenham. I am not counting my chickens but a good win always brings a smile to my face. Still can not get over the fact that Jermaine Penas missed a sitter - 2m out with an open goal, he slides and the balls goes over the line. He must be a Liverpool striker underneath.

Gonzalez did well to grab the first, Kuitis-Scoreforus bagged a great goal and Risse sent a rocket to the Kop. All good!

Then we see Reading grab a point against MU and really, any time MU drop points I can not help but smile. HAPPY DAYS!

Sorry Keropok, I am really terrible to MU fans and only feel sorry for you. I have too many friends who swear allegiance to the residents of the Theatre of Creams and I hear it a lot. We won so many EPL premierships, we finished on top of you BLAH BLAH BLAH BLAH! Even the formifable and beautiful Metria is a ManUSA fan.

And lastly my mate Vic, talks a lot of crap about MU being this super team but he never makes sense and his arguments tend to me superflous.

So to Vic and others I say.....DOYLEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Lasly, my AFL team the West Coast Eagles won through to the AFL Grand Final which will be played this Saturday here in Melbourne. We had to play away and were losing for most of the match but not the last quarter when it counts!

And that is the moral of the story childrens, it is not who leads at the start but how you finish and where. So we apply that to the EPL.

Anyway, the hype for the AFL final shall be building and I look forward to Saturday!

Muslims react angrily to being told they react angrily

The above title was installed in jest my friends. There is no need to be screaming "Jihad for Dev" or stuff of that sort. All in good fun!

Talking about fun, I was awoken via an SMS from a friend proclaiming the Dirk Kuyt (pronounced "Koit") had scored his first goal for the 'Pool. I got up and quickly turned on the TV.

We were lucky not to have a penalty given against us. The defense does not look as strong as they did last year but I am glad that Alonso is finally discovering his prowess and passing. But the team is starting to show some good form. Hopefully over the next few matches we start firing on all cylinders and get into contention for the Premiership!

I of course, can not go without mentioning Alonso's super goal from 65 yards out. Yeah the keeper tripped but that is why concentration is a huge element in games. He got caught out.

Nonetheless we kept a clean sheet and gained 3 points. More importantly we scored 2 goals and I was really fretting that we would have to call Alcoholics Anonymous to Anfield given the number of times the lads were hitting the bar.

Good start to the morning. Even with comments from Metria commenting "For football you can get up so early"

All hugs and smiles over at Anfield

Cross Cultures in Australia

I want to talk politics today. Mainly Aussie politics.

See these days there is a debate brewing that immigrants should adopt Australian values and be able to speaka da English! I am in two minds about this, – for and against this notion basically.

On the FOR hand, what John Howard the Australian PM (let'’s just call him the Lil Toad or LT) is saying is that immigrants should wait 4 years before they can gain citizenship (right now it is 2 years), take a English speaking test and an Australian values test.

Looking at this, I tend to agree because I came here as an immigrants and as most people who have spoken to me could attest, – I can speak the English, I can also write, (although my typo'’s and grammar on this blog present another case) and I also have a sense of Aussie values after living for 25 years here.

Further to this, my parents and family all speak good English and understand other Aussies and what is all about. My brother "“Jeet-man"” is probably more Aussie than Punjabi/Malaysian and that is due to him being here for all is life apart from the first 2 years. But he has not forgotten his heritage, while his bhangra dancing is funny to watch and he can not speak Punjabi, he still retains core values that were taught to him by family and after my beatings!!

So in a way what is being said is generally fair. I believe that if you live in a country you should learn to adopt the language of the majority and accept the customs of that country. if I ever decided to live in Malaysia I would try to Malay malay so I could communicate with people and learn the customs, such as how to merge when driving.

Further, the 4 year waiting period for Australian citizenship is a good thing. For me it ensures that people appreciate citizenship a whole lot more. I get a notion that a lot of recent young citizens do not seem to value it a whole lot, or not as much I do. These are the ones who are willing to enjoy the lifestyle here yet denigrate Australia when things do not seem to go their way.

This happens everywhere, and people should count their blessing that they can walk down their street without worrying about being mugged, raped or having their purses snatched and dragged away.

On the other hand......

I consider the Lil Toad as a racist bigot and this line of thinking is a way of appeasing the majority rather than trying to enhance relations with minorities. In a way it is a return to days of the White Australia Policy (this was a policy that only allow migrations from a "“white country"” -mainly the UK).

I generally think that if someone wants to come here, they do so to live a better live and it is only fair that they learn what Australia is about. They should not seclude themselves and only integrate themselves with people from their homeland but get out there and learn about the people in this country.

Yes, this includes learning how to communicate in the main language. If I went back to live in Australia endeavorndeavour to learn how to speak Malay so I could intergrate myself into a country. I hate seeing people bow down to a person just because they are a foreigner and just because they are white.

Similarly, white Australian should also not be myopic and believe that because they comprise the majority here, that they have a god-given right to think they are superior. They should also make the effort to learn about other cultures. After all, every person living here, apart from the Aborigines, emigrated here be in last week, 30 years ago or due to their forefathers 200 years ago.

Australia has an opportunity to show the world how a secular society can form and function by being able to integrate all different types of cultures. This place could show the world how differences between cultures and religion could assimilate to form some harmonyharmoney. A place where each person can be respected for who they are and not what colour their skin who they pray to.

Everyone should be able to enjoy a Sunday afternoon BBQ or a beer (whether it be a Crown Lager or a Root Beer) with others. Sit back and relax while watching a game of AFL, Cricket or Football.

So while there are merits on some of the policies, the reasons for such changes are wrong. They are being touted to appease a Xenaphobic majority (who happen to be white). This is not the 1950's or the days where Pauline Hanson's comments was running riot through Asia where her policies were spoken as being the point of view of the average Aussie. She was ridiculed by people here as being an uneducated loser who did not speak for all Australians. Yet here we are, in the 21st century, and we are heading back to the white only days.

With that I think the policy is wrong as it is ethically incorrect. Do away with it and encourage recent immigrants to learn English and what it means to be an Australian. Both sides, the new and the old, reaching out to one another to help each other.

After all, that is what being a mate is about, and being a mate is what Australia is all about.

Not a happy Monday

Can you imagine what it would be like if you had not got jiggy wioth it for a long time and then you were stuck in a room with a sex starved/deprived Jessica Alba or John Abraham (depending on your sex and/or sexual preference) and not being able to get it up or motivated?

You would be frustrated and after they leave the room you would feel this sense of dissapointment and frustration on your part. You just let a great opportunity slip past and could not see when something like that could happen again for you.

That was what happened last night when the 'Pool lost to a 10 man Chelsea last night.

We played better and attacked more. We had the better chances but we either hit the post of kicked/headed the ball straight to the keeper!

BUGGER this!!!

The only consolation is that ManUre lost at home to the Arse! At least i do not have to put up with crap from my mate Vic - his team lost at home. We were away.

BUGGER this!!!

The return of the Manager

After a season away from the football managing scene, I decided I needed to come back. I miss Saturday's getting together with the lads and shouting at them from the sidelines.

The latest season of our league was completed last weekend and my 'old' team finished 6th. To be honest, it was a poor effort and probably the real reason I am returning. I was not too pleased with some of the acts that were occurring within the team.

I am not blaming the guys who took over as no one really put their hand up and it fell to a couple of the lads. These guys did a commendable job but I think their lack of experience, youth and lithe size all conspired against them. I have a theory that because I am a large fella the guys are scared of me as I give the impression that I could really hurt them - but not too many get the fact that they are faster than me!

Now the focus will start shifting to the next year and next season. I do want to restore some order and also instill a different type of playing style and system. The hope here is the guys start coming to training regularly and with this training we really improve as a team.

I look forward to it and have started working on my hand gestures from the sidelines ala Rafael Benitez! I can dream!!!

Impressing Chinese parents 101

I received the following note through email and thought I would share with you. An Interesting read. I should start working on an Indian version.....

You're in love. You love her. She loves you. You talk on the phone for hours at a time. You drive her everywhere. You find yourself spending fifty bucks on cuddly Korean stuffed toys that cost a buck twenty to make in Shenzen. In short, your world is complete. Now the only things standing in the way of your complete bliss are her parents. Want to learn how to overcome these obstacles? Welcome to impressing Chinese parents 101. Guys, take note. These are ancient secrets that up to now only a handful of noble families knew of. Father to son, to his son and so on. Only recently have these powerful techniques been catalogued and brought to the public's attention. Girls, take note too. If you love him, make him learn these rules. Harmony in the house, between your man and your mom and dad is paramount. And what's more they can be used when you meet his parents! Okay let's get down to the details.

Basically, we'll be covering what to wear, drive, say, bring, and talk about during dinner. We'll also cover what details to reveal about yourself, what your "supposed" ambitions are in life, what your family does for a living, and how much to eat during dinner. Finally, since there is no way to cover every conceivable situation which could arise, we will teach you the secret of secrets, to be used only in times of dire need. Please proceed.

What to Wear

Wear Polo or Tommy Hilfiger, as these labels will make you seem non-threatening. Chinese parents like non-threatening. They like to think that their daughter will be the boss of you and that you will be a hard worker and give her all the money you make. When she has all the money, she can lavish her parents with gifts and give them a nice life. Through you, their daughter will be able to repay her debt to her generous parents who sacrificed to give her a better life.

Under NO circumstances should you wear French Connection UK. Chinese parents know very little English, but they'll recognize the obvious mangling of one of the three words in their working vocabulary of English. The other two English words that Chinese parents also know are "yes" and "no", although "yes" is seldom used.

What to Drive

Borrow your parents' Accord. Your parents don't drive an Accord? Borrow their Camry. Your parents don't drive a Camry? Wait you're Chinese right? You're not Chinese and you're meeting your girlfriend's Chinese parents? Hmm, we have a problem here that we don't have room to cover in this article, so please proceed to purchasing the textbook, now in its 7th edition. Some other acceptable cars to show up at their house with are Corollas and Civics. Contrary to popular belief, Mercedes and BMWs are not good choices. Her parents won't like the idea that you are flashy. You could try to front and say that your parents are rich, but this can go both ways. If her parents smile, this means that they are gold-diggers. If they are gold-diggers, then your girlfriend is one too. If they don't smile, it means they have an inferiority complex and feel that their daughter should be matched up with someone of the same social class. Take my word, go Honda and Toyota.

What to Say

Several years ago, the beautiful and amazing Chinese vocalist Sandy Lam came out with a song called "Talk more, screw up more." It would be wise to listen to Sandy's advice. Say as little as possible. Let your girlfriend's dad brag about his prowess in the stock market. Let him bore you with his outlook on the Hong Kong - China or the China - Taiwan situation. Let him put metaphorical "money in your pocket" by sharing his experiences and the work attitudes that made him the man he is today. He will wave his hands about the room and tell you that if you work hard, one day all of this will also be yours.

If you must speak be modest and apologize for not knowing much. Chinese parents ask a lot of rhetorical questions. Feign ignorance. Let THEM answer the question for you and then say that's what YOUR parents tell you all the time. Your girlfriend's mom will beam from ear to ear, and chide you about new world folly versus old world wisdom. In truth, she is not admonishing you as much as she is strutting her tail feathers. Let her strut, by all
means let her fuss and strut.

The Meeting

It's either at a restaurant or at their house. If it's at a restaurant, pretend to fight half-heartedly for the bill but let the real man at the table pay for it. Pour tea constantly even if no tea has been drank from the cups. I once poured the tea so high that it was actually higher than the rim of the teacup. Thank goodness for grade 12 physics and that lecture about surface tension. If they actually let you pay (not a good sign), leave a 3% tip. Chinese parents love frugality. But you might also want to rethink ever going back to that restaurant for fear that you will be recognized.

Most likely the meeting will be at their house. This is their territory. In this territory, your girlfriend's dad is king. Your girlfriend's mom is queen. You would do well to remember that. First off, bring something. To show up empty handed or what the Chinese refer to as "two bunches of bananas" is disgraceful. Bring tea, bring dried mushrooms, bring dried scallop, bring ginseng, bring dried seafood, bring bird's nest, or even bring shark's fin if you can afford it. Do not bring a case of Molson Canadian. Do not bring tiramisu (Chinese parents won't eat what they cannot say). Do not bring bbq pork or other dishes (this is an insult as it suggests that your host didn't make enough food). Do not bring anything that's name sounds like "4" unless you are wishing death on the Mr. and Mrs.

When you meet them don't call them by their first names or address them by Mister and Mrs. and their last name. Go "uncle" or "aunty". By doing this you've made yourself a part of the family. Be of the belief that all men are brothers with different mothers. Also, never let your guard down, because while you are trying to earn their affection, you have to recognize that the parents are the enemy. There is nothing you can do that will ever make you good enough for their little girl, so know your enemy. Recognize that all girlfriends' parents are old, crabby uncles and aunts that smell of white flower oil or tiger balm. The dad uses too much Brylcreem in his hair, while the mother wears an updo. Of course she doesn't know that updos are actually back in style. For parents, time and coolness stops after 40, so don't even try to relate.

Dinner

Before the meeting, remember to not eat for two days. Then, when you go to your future in-laws house, go to town on her mom's lion's head meat balls or her mom's shrimp paste stuffed tofu or her mom's bitter melon beef. Sing the praises of the dishes as if it were dishes fit for Pu Yi himself. You do know who Pu Yi is right? Have at least four bowls of rice. Conventional wisdom dictates that making a pig of yourself is not wise. On the contrary, lavishing your future mother-in-law with praise is a shrewd investment that will reward you with ample dividends down the road.

Dinner Talk

If they're Christian, say how you've always wanted to be converted and ask for their guidance. Offer to go to a sermon with them that coming Sunday. If they're non-religious talk about saving money to buy a house (they love this). Tell them you've been condo shopping. Talk about a general mistrust of computers, but the necessity of computers in the modern world. Talk about famous singers like Teresa Teng. All Chinese people love Teresa Teng. If there's one thing that China Chinese and Taiwan Chinese people can agree on it is Teresa Teng. You're on your own if you talk about Four Big Sky Kings, Cookies or Twins. Talk about how Rap Talk is stupid. Remember to use the words "rap talk". They'll look at you blankly if you use terms like "hiphop" or "urban". Talk about how everything is so expensive. In short, be as fake as a ten-dollar Rolex.

Yourself

Don't talk about your grand schemes to save the world. Don't talk carpe diem, getting colonics, the protein diet, google, and other new age crap. Don't tell them about your plan for an Internet business. Don't tell them about how you plan to backpack across Europe after you graduate from university, that is if you decide to go at all. Tell them that ever since you were a kid you wanted to be a doctor. Tell them that your parents are strict. Tell them that their daughter is your first girlfriend. Tell them you're a straight A student (what are they going to do, phone the school?). (editor's note: I wouldn't place bets on that)

Your Family

This is a thorny issue, but if your parents are notorious triad gangsters, tell them that your parents own an importing and exporting company. If your parents are working stiffs, tell them that your parents are working stiffs who saved every cent so you can go to medical school. If you're out of school, tell them that your parents are retired, but got part-time jobs because they were bored sitting at home.

The Secret of all Secrets

Even if you do everything as we have instructed, situations may arise where all your hard work is for naught. In that event, use the secret of secrets to get yourself out of trouble every time. Lie. Simply calm your mind and pretend that they are your parents. It's so easy to lie to your own parents, isn't it? Your parents actually think your credit is fine. They don't know about how you are on Prozac. They don't know about how you smoke (thank goodness for breath mints). Once you realize that all parents are the same, you'll find that it's a cinch to lie to other people's parents as well.

The Conclusion

In parting, I expect some of you out there to doubt the effectiveness of these techniques. Why would anyone call someone who is not related to him "uncle" or "aunty"? Who in his right mind doesn't like tiramisu? Who is Sandy Lam? And who the heck is Teresa Teng? (For your information Faye Wong frequently covers her songs. Who is Faye Wong? Awwww...just forget about it.)

Ah, young grasshopper. If I could I would introduce you to the future you, a future you who is sad and depressed because Chu Chu (piggy) or Boh Boh (precious) or whatever other cutesy name you have for your girlfriend won't see you anymore. You feel independent. You feel powerful. You feel you don't have to kiss up to your girlfriend's parents right? It's an illusion.

Children are only as independent as their parents allow them to be. Cut off the credit cards, the cell phone (they pay the bill right?), the Lexus IS300, and all the other perks and your girlfriend is a nerd in Seven jeans. You have to realize that you are fighting the equivalent of The Machines in the Matrix. To be a successful Neo, follow these words.

Off the snow i go

After the weekend that past i make this qualification - that skiing is very easy, it is just the stopping and turning that i had troubles with!

Luckily, skiing was not the main event of the weekend. We involved ourselves in a lot of eating, drinking and hanging out with friends. Now to recap the weekend, I shall go back and start from the beginning - Friday morning.

Firstly, we departed my house a little late because our driving partners (more importantly my friend) got a little drunk and had a hard time getting up. So I took the sterring wheel and started heading to the mountains. The drive was pleasant as we witnessed some of the Yarra Valley, passing a number of wineries where I was wishing we could stop to sample the varieties of reds, rose` and whites they had to offer.

Eventually, after a few winding roads and our ears popping a few times we arrived at Mt Buller. We had to park our car and take the local Taxi to our place of accommodation. Now because they try to save the environment, personal cars are not allowed into the hill - it is actually a great idea but do they rip you off. I mean we paid $28 for a return trip that takes no more than 15 minutes. Even taxi's in sydney do not charge you that much!

But we arrived in a lovely apartment which had fantastic views of the mountains, quite a site. We did some exploring and found that we were about 50m from the centre of the mountain which house a few hire shops, cafes and bars. Not bad and well done to Harry and Jen for getting us this place.

We did not hit the slopes that day but settled in and we ate that night. We also partook in some Uno and I won one of the games. Should have won something else but I reckon there was some collusion going on to stop me - kind of like a ref in our league!

The next day we hot the slopes after hiring soem ski's, poles and boots that were strapped so tight I had a hard time breathing. Now this is where it gets interesting.

See snow boots are weird as they do not allow yu to bend our foot so walking involves your feet staying at right angles to your leg so you walk weirdly. After a while it starts to get annoying. Because we were beginners, we had to walk up to the training area and it tookeffort and time to lug ourselves, the ski's and poles up there.

Eventually we began our lesson, it lasts about 2 hours and I thought we could progress a bit. But the lesson involved us standing in line, side stepping up the hill and going down the slope individually.

Before I even got to the top of the queue I had fallen down and struggled up. It should be noted that there was not alot of snow and it had compacted to be quite hard! When i did get to the stop I started the downward decent and tried to stop as the instructor asked us.

But I could not! So to stop myself going past the instructor and don the hill and super speeds I did what any person would do, I fell! right on my a$$! This went on a few times during the lesson. i also had to purposely fall down a few times as I was heading to other skiiers - I figured I would do less damage that way.

Eventually I thought myself to stop properly by spreading my legs farther out than the instructor had told me.

So the lesson was a kind of waste of time for us. I was also annoyed because Metria had fallen and was struggling to get up. No one was helping her and i was struggling to gain control but eventually I just went and helped her up.

But I managed to move and manoeuvre a bit. So I got the bascis of the basics sorted out!

The rest of the weekend was spent hanging out with friends and sight seeing. It also snowed a bit Saturday night so we had a light blanket of white copvering the place the next day.

And the hills are steep so walking and sightseeing took some effort.

Overall a fun weekend. The highlight was of course seeing snow and learning to ski. The lowlight was seeing these 4/5 year old, 3 foot kids skiing and moving like professionals. little shits!!

Off to the Snow

Today is Thursday and will be the last day of work for me for the week. For Metria and I shall be heading off to the snow with some chums. The weekend should be fun with higlights being the both of us tackling skiing for the first time.

This could be me!!

This should be an interesting experiment as it involves a fair bit of coordination and balance. There could be some surprised but I think it will be very comical. The two of us, well ok I talk for me here, are bound to be falling a lot. Getting up, falling and then getting up.

This is probably a more accurate picture of what will be happening....HELP!!!!

We will beheading to Mt Buller which is about 3 hours from Melbourne. Should be an enjopyable drive and hopefully we get there with no issues. There is a matter of the car needing snow chains but as we are travelling with slightly more experienced people (that is they have been ther already) i am sure my mate can handle this while I sit in the car, with the heater on giving him the "thumbs up" sign!

It will be interesting to experience the ski/snow community there and to be in the snow. Things to also do are to make a snowman and do the snow angels thing. Would love tobe in a snowball fight but my friends are probably too mature for that!

The next entry will contain some pics of the trip

Steve Irwin - 1962 to 2006

Most of you would have heard the sad news that Steve irwon, known as the Crocodile Hunter, died off the coast of north east Australia yesterday. He was stung by a sting-ray and was likely to have been killed instantly.

He was quite a character and definently promoted the phrase "CRIKEY" to the world.

He was known here but only gained a sense of popularity over the lat few yers. Previously he was not really well known. I remember his first appearance on TV. He came on a late night chat show and he was talking like such an Aussie, I thought he came straight from 1980. Even some of the panelists were looking amused at how he talked.

But one thing you never doubted was his passion for conservation and protecting wildlife. He brought to the forefront the need for the world to be wary that what we do can have a huge impact on the ecosystem.

He was the Wildlife Warrior.

The Crocodile Hunter

And he died doing what he loved best.

Something fishy at West Ham

Hmmmm.....West Ham United sign two 22 year old Argentinian players who were part of their world cup squad - Carlos Tevez and Javier Mascherano. Both players are very good, both players would have cost a bank and then some to buy from Corinthians. Both players are rated as being worth a total of at least 50m pounds!

The Hammers are now expected to be pretty decent and should challenge for the top part of the league given the midfield and strike force of Reo-Corker, Bobby Zamora, Marlon Harewood, Ben Haim etc etc. I am glad the 'Pool played them last week and won coz they are going to be a handful.

Javier would have been a good buy and I know one fellow blogger was looking forward to his signing with MU. You can read his thoughts here. Bad luck buddy!

Still I have some questions and I think something is up and it involves Chelsea.

Chelsea seem to have a penchant for buying players so the big clubs such as MU, the Arse and the Pool can not buy them. Look at Shaun Wright Phillips who has basically sat on the bench and then look at Michael Essien who is unlikely to play a lot given the midfield players they have.

Both Tevez and Mascherano are signed to a company called Media Sports Inc and a shareholder is one Mr Roman Ambranovich - he who owns Chelsea.

Something is up!

There was no way these two guys would go to Arseanal or ManUSA as they would be strengtened and may challenge Chelsea for the league title or heaven forbid, the Champions League. So they go to a decent club but not a real title challenger.

As part of the Hammers team , the Special Dufus and Roman Billionaire can gauge how they adapt to the style and play of the EPL. If they do not turn out like Juan Sebastian Veron then I think there will be a sale to Chelsea for some huge amounts of cash.

Sounds fishy doesn't it!

* * * * * * * *

On another note, the league is in recess which is a shame as i amgoing to miss my EPL this weekend. Yeah MaU are on top but good that the Cheqski have lost a game (thanks to Mark Viduka). Lets hope that lads can get a decent win in the Derby and we can challenge for the title. Oh well.